>Casting Crowns was awesome last night. Lori and I had front row and it was amazing. In usual fashion, Mark Hall preached between songs and he really hit home sometimes. His introduction to “Slow Fade” is one that stands out in my memory. Losing our faith and passion for Christ and turning back to the world, letting our old sin nature rule again, is not an overnight process. Over time, after many little compromises that build into larger ones, our spirit slowly fades away and “man I used to be rises up in me again.”

I could certainly relate to this message. I remember my first six months after my true heart conversion to Jesus. I was on fire, nothing could shake my faith. I was in the word, in prayer, hearing the direction of the Holy Spirit. Now, nine years down the road, my faith is shaky at best, I feel very distant from God. I rarely pray and when I do it feels awkward. I struggle with pornography, have been to rehab twice for alcohol, drug and sex addiction. I rarely read my bible. I gawk at women, curse with the best of them, gossip at work. I have indeed experienced the slow fade back to the man I used to be.

God, last night I prayed the prayer of salvation again. Please Lord help be to repent, to turn around and begin to walk in a new direction, with you and in the light of your mercy and grace. Amen.